


Visions (Jodie Whittaker x Reader)

by JodieWhittakerisbae



Category: Real Person Fiction
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, College, F/F, Gay, Gay For You, Hugs, Lesbian Character, School, Stress Relief, Sweet, Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-13
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-21 03:07:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30015192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JodieWhittakerisbae/pseuds/JodieWhittakerisbae
Summary: When it all gets too much, Y/N wants to get away from it all, and in doing so, she meets someone who is sure to help her.Just a little Jodie x you fic for you to enjoy, I love reading these myself and wish they were real every time, so I thought I'd give one a go.Trigger warning ⚠: this could trigger your/someone's anxiety if you know that's something you struggle with. It's nothing as bad as self harm or suicide but the character just has a little mental breakdown which could get you thinking about your own stuff. Everyone has their own experiences, so if you think it'll trigger you, please be careful, you come first.
Relationships: Jodie Whittaker/Reader
Kudos: 1





	Visions (Jodie Whittaker x Reader)

**Author's Note:**

> vision[ˈvɪʒ(ə)n]NOUNthe faculty or state of being able to see."she had defective vision"synonyms: · · power of sight · faculty of sight · the ability to think about or plan the future with imagination or wisdom."the organization had lost its vision and direction"synonyms: · · creative power · · an experience of seeing someone or something in a dream or trance, or as a supernatural apparition."the idea came to him in a vision"synonyms: · · · · · a person or sight of unusual beauty."madame was a vision in black velvet"synonyms:beautiful sight · vision of loveliness · feast for the eyes · VERBrareimagine."we visioned a small lawn surrounded with a perfect tangle of trees"
> 
> Trigger warning ⚠: this could trigger your/someone's anxiety if you know that's something you struggle with. It's nothing as bad as self harm or suicide but the character just has a little mental breakdown which could get you thinking about your own stuff. There is the Implication of the character wanting to die, but she does not act on it. Everyone has their own experiences, so if you think it'll trigger you, please be careful, you come first. 
> 
> I don't know whether there'll be more chapters or not, well just have to wait and see! 
> 
> Also, when I say college, I mean in a British sense, not an American sense, because I'm envisioning the character about 17 years old, just so you don't get confused. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy, since there isn't much, if any, Jodie x reader stuff on here.

I was so overwhelmed with online college work I could scream. It was like the teachers gave us more work than they would usually do. Maybe it was because I woke up late this morning, or I'd spent more time having lunch than I usually would, but I don't remember doing either of those things. 

I finally finished at around five o'clock, at least an hour or two after when I was meat to. I just needed to get away; I was still feeling incredibly anxious and frustrated, even though I had submitted all the work I needed to, and so decided to go on a walk, despite still being fragile.

I just wanted to run away from it all. College, my family. My friends were the only good thing I had left, but I was scared they would think me stupid for crying over such a small thing. Small to them anyway.

As I made my way along the path that lead to the Pentland Hills, near where I lived, I could feel my eyes fill with tears again, and I did as much as could to stifle them without getting too many looks from passers by. I clutched the Thirteenth Doctor pin I always kept in my pocket for good luck, hoping that she could give me hope, like she had done countless times before. But when I got into the hills and made sure I was alone, I began to run, and tears began to do the same down my cheeks. What had come over me? A small part of me realized this was like a movie scene, except the character is usually doing what I am doing for a much more dramatic and worthy reason, like they just found out they're pregnant with an unexpected baby, or their boyfriend cheated on them, or they lost a child or a lover.

Cries escaped from my mouth as I began to think about, not only how stressful today was, but how tomorrow would probably be the same. And then my mind ran away, and began remembering all the times I had felt this wretched, all the times I'd been so embarrassed I wanted to cry, or all the times I cried in front of people, then got embarrassed, then cried harder. And everytime I've been so angry I've wanted to hurt someone, badly. And every time I've led someone on, or said I love you and didn't mean it, or just been untruthful. Everything I've ever regretted. Every time I've been so angry, or sad, I've wanted to scream the worst word I could think of at the top of my lungs. Every time I've loved someone, but they haven't loved me back, or broken my heart. 

I began to cry so much it was hard to breathe, so much my knees were weak and I fell to the soft bed of grass. I shut my eyes so tight and submit myself to the void of blackness. The grass is soft, and warm from the sun. This is comfortable. I wouldn't mind if I just fell asleep here and never woke up. 

Suddenly, through my blanket of blackness, I hear a voice. It sounds familiar, I know who it is immediately, but my brain disagrees with my instinct, telling me it's just my imagination. 

"Are you okay?" The voice says. 

Slowly and tentatively, I open my eyes and lift my head, scared I might not find the body whose voice its matches. But my stomach flips and my heart swells as I see the person I'd hoped, knelt on the grass beside me, a worried look on her face. It can't be. Oh, god, now I'm seeing visions. That's all I need. But that's all it was, my brain was telling me, just visions.

My all time idol, number one celebrity crush, and practically my gay awaking (although the official title goes to one of my best friends in primary school, Melody). 

Jodie Whittaker. 

I stood up slowly, glad to be distracted from my thoughts, and she stood up with me. A small part within me still told me it was a vision, a hallucination, maybe a symptom of the splitting headache I have from all the crying. 

But she touched me. She touched my arm. Can visions do that? An even bigger part within me somehow believed this was true, and was screaming it from the back of my mind. 

She asked me again, "Are you alright?"

And all I can muster is a frenzied "Oh my god, I love you!" Before bursting into tears again and practically collapsing into her arms. 

Oh, what she must think of me, I don't even know. I could be a lunatic, or piss-drunk right now, yet she held me in her arms so kindly. My face buried in the soft material of her beautiful white dress, I cried into her shoulder. I could feel her arms wrapped around me through my pale yellow summer dress. It was just like how I'd imagined it. How? Nothing is ever as you imagine it. But it is. I feel so safe in her arms, like nothing could ever touch me, or harm me again. I feel safe. Yet, I am a stranger to her. 

She didn't even know my name, but she was comforting me, saying "sh, sh" over and over again, like you would to a baby, but not undermining me in any way. 

"What's your name, darlin'?" she asked me. 

I barely registered that she called me darling, focused still on breathing in her scent of custard creams and coffee and vanilla, all mixed together to create something that was uniquely hers. 

But I mumbled "Y/N L/N" into her shoulder, and reluctantly pulled out of the hug. 

She pressed her thumb to my cheek and wiped away a tear, and my heart skipped a beat. It was real. What I'd dreamt about for years was finally happening. What's more, she hugged me! Well, I hugged her, but she hugged me back! God, I was so embarrassed. But she didn't seem fazed at all. She acted so calm, like people fall into her arms in the midst of a mental breakdown every day. 

Summoning all the courage I could muster, I asked her "Jodie, what are you doing In Edinburgh?"

"A photoshoot, but never mind that. If you don't mind me asking, are you okay? "

"Yeah, yeah, I'm okay, thanks for the hug, I needed it." I say, a nervous wreck, although I had stopped crying. "That probably looked quite dramatic, me curled up on the floor. I didn't think I anyone would see me."

"As long as you're okay," Jodie replied. God, why did she have to be so kind, it was killing me, knowing I would probably never see her again. Then I realized just who I was talking to and began to say a few of the many words I've wanted to say to her since forever, all stored up in my mind. 

"I really love your work, all of your characters mean so much to me and you are so inspiring." It all came out it a jumbled mess and sounded so generic, but it was true. Of course, there was more intimate personal things I wanted to say to her, but I wouldn't dream of telling them now, when we'd only met for a few minutes, or, considering the usual nature of fan encounters, ever. 

"Aaaww! Thank you! I wish I had a signed picture or something to give you." 

"No, no, I don't want that." I reply, then add hastily, not wanting to be accidentally rude to the one person I care about most in the world, as crazy as it sounds, right now, "Not that I'm not totally in awe of you, it's actually the complete opposite, I just don't want to be that type of fan. The hug was far better." Then a massive grin infested my face and I couldn't stop smiling, I was talking to Jodie Whittaker! 

"I like you, Y/N." As she said it my heart pounded. Oh, shut up Y/N, of course she doesn't mean it in that way. 

"Thanks, I like you too." I say, bashfully. Jodie wouldn't realize, but I practically just confessed my love to her. Because that phrase can mean so many things. I love you, I have a crush on you, I like your personality, I like being with you. I meant all of those things at once. It was so ambiguous, and usually didn't work in my favor, but today, it did. 

"Give me your arm." She said, and so I did, slightly confused. At the feeling of her hand on my arm, my stomach did a a somersault, but in a good way, like when you drive down a hill in the car, and you're scared at first, but only for like a millisecond before you realize it was exhilarating. 

She began writing a number on my arm with a pen she had pulled out from her dress pocket, and I was still confused at first. Until It clicked. She was writing her number on my arm! Her phone number! 

"There!" She said with a subtle lick of her lips. "It was nice meeting you Y/N, call me if you need anything."

"Will do." I said with possibly the most confidence I'd had all day, which still was quite little. I smiled as I said it and tucked a piece of stray hair behind my ear, girlishly. Ugh, I probably look like a fool. I feel like a fool. Then she headed off in the same direction she came, but stopped after a few metres to give me one final wave goodbye. 

She'd given me her phone number! Jodie Whittaker had given me her phone number! Did she do that with other fans? Maybe she did. I hadn't seen it, but that didn't mean it wasn't real, like air, or unicorns. No, she's not the type of person to just go around giving out her phone number. Is she? I don't know her. 

Why do I have to feel this way? Now my celebrity crush had turned to a real life crush. A celebrity crush turns to a real life crush when you have their number, doesn't it? Either way, when it was just a celebrity crush, it was easier to accept that it would never happen, and to trick myself that I wasn't in love with her. How could you be in love with someone you've never met? I had accepted that I would never meet her, and it would stay a crazy obsession with a celebrity, that she would never know about. But it was more than an obsession. I didn't just love her for her body, like how straight girls crush on Chris Pratt, or Dwayne Johnson. I admired and respected her, she inspired me, I wanted to be like her, she meant so much to me, she helped me grow and learn things. 

Despite my inner monologue, one thing is certain. I am never washing my left arm again. 

I walk away with a smile on my face. Yes, I hate that my mood can change so drastically from good to bad. But everything is so worth it when something happens to change it from the lowest of low, to the highest of high. 

I want to squeal at the top of my lungs, like a kid on Christmas day, but the realistic part of me decided instead to whip out my phone and quickly take a picture of my arm with Jodie's number on it, not wanting to forget it when it inevitably rubs off. It looks quite aesthetic with the soft background of the grass and ethereal light of the evening. Then I type it as a new contact into my phone. I name the contact:

😍✨Jodie✨😍

Too much? I don't think so

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked i! Leave kudos and comment if you did, I really appreciate it. I have decided there will be at least tone other chapter, if not two, but I don't know when I will post them, so stay tuned and follow me if you want to be notified when I do. ♡＾▽＾♡
> 
> Thanks for readin! Comment and kudos appreciated!


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